" 'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord. 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call up on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.' " Jeremiah 29:11-13
Well, it's been a month since my last blog entry (the date says Mar. 17 because that's when I first started it...) Clearly, it too me much longer than I intended to get it completed but, that's life sometimes. :-)
So, I left off saying I'd talk about my spiritual journey during the past 2 years. When I was diagnosed with breast cancer, I was scared but, I still knew that my life... every moment of it, every breath of it, was counted by my Creator. I knew that I could run to my heavenly Father for solace & comfort. Was I good at doing that up to that point in my life, sadly, no. But, facing my mortality definitely did that for me. I knew that instantly a multitude of prayers were being said for me and that God was listening.
As I walked through the months of surgery & chemo, I spent a lot of time reading, praying and getting wise counsel about what my purpose in life really was. What was my "divine" calling? What did God want for my life? I know that God has given us the ultimate gift of free will, but, He still has a unique purpose and path for each of us, I desperately wanted to know mine.
I knew that my life's purpose would be working with and (hopefully) inspiring people. It would be helping people to achieve a better understanding of others and relationships. I also believed that my love of public speaking, team building, and mentoring would also be a part of this plan.
I reconnected with a Rick from MGI who I'd taken training from in 2002. I had long believed it was the best training experience I'd ever had and it was useful both professionally & personally from the moment you leave the training; at the time when we reconnected during my chemo, I had no idea how or if MGI would fit into my future.
In February 2008, just before I went back to work, I was invited by a church in Edmonton to speak to a group of about 100 girls aged 11-17 about my experience with cancer, self-esteem & beauty. It was an incredible honour and blessing to me. God used the opportunity to show me that my dreams were possible. However, when I got back to work in March of 2008, after months of hoping for a divine epiphany, I was a little bit frustrated but still intent on discovering what my future direction would be. A few months later, I was invited to lead a workshop at a Women's conference; yet another small nudge.
To make a long story short, through much prayer, discussion and self-discovery, I realized that I really did want to pursue team building, facilitation, leadership development and speaking. Over the months, Rick & I had stayed in touch and over the months that followed, I had the opportunity to work a bit with Rick & Ryan (his son & business partner). Again, confirmation that it was something that was a fit for me and I truly loved it. So, December 31, 2009 was my last official day with Long View Systems after over 6 great years. Leaving was bittersweet for me because Long View really was so good to me but, I was excited to be going to follow my dreams.
Since January 2009, I've been contracting full-time with MGI. I really enjoy working with Rick & Ryan; we have a great rapport and balance each other nicely. It has been a true blessing to my family that I now stay home until the kids are off to school and get home around 3:30pm. Rick has been in business 25 years and believes strongly in putting family & health first. I've had great opportunities with MGI and a few outside of MGI, too. I've learned so much and God keeps showing me that He has wonderful things in store for me and my family.
Another area that is moving forward is the class for teen girls on self-esteem, etc. When I was a teen, my mom arranged for a class in Camrose and my sister and I attended; it was such a great influence in my life and with 3 daughters, I've wanted to do a similar thing for teen girls. Over a year ago, I shared this vision with my friend, Janelle, and we've had many discussions about it. Well, April 19/09 will be the kick off of our inaugural class. We have several wonderful women helping us out and we are basing it around curriculum by Dr. Katie Brazelton & Shelley Leith called "Head-to-Soul Makeover". It is a 10 week class focused on character and based around current TV reality shows. We pray it will be a blessing for these girls.
During my search for the curriculum (we'd been told about it by one of the ladies helping out), I came upon Life Purpose Coaching Centers International founded by Dr. Katie Brazelton. I felt a nudging to look into what they offered as curriculum. Within a week, I found myself registered for a coaching course starting April 2 and being taught by Dr. B. herself!!! It only gave me about 2 weeks before the course began. As a part of the course, I had to hire a coach which has been a great blessing for me. Dr. Hopelyn Brown is fantastic and I'm learning so much. Through LPCCI, there are several levels of courses I can take and, I'm thinking I probably will eventually. I wasn't really looking for this but, God surprises us sometimes with just what we need to take the next step.
I don't know what else is in store for me and sometimes I'm plagued with self-doubt and worry BUT, thanks to wise counsel, I'm learning to be watch & listen for confirmations that I'm moving in the right direction. I'm learning to step out boldly to embrace the gifts and talents God has given me. Is my path completely clear? No. But, little by little, bit by bit, it is being revealed and I'm learning to revel in the journey.
What little surprises are out there waiting for you? What is your unique purpose in life?
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
3 Short Movies...
I decided to share these 3 short videos that I did over the 1st year of my diagnosis. The first one was for Thanksgiving 07 right before my 3rd round of chemo (the 1/2 way point), the second one was for Christmas 07 right before my 6th (& last) round of chemo, and the last video was from the 1 yr anniversary of my diagnosis. I guess they are pretty much self explanatory :-)
Sunday, March 8, 2009
"...a time to heal..."
"A time to kill and a time to heal. A time to tear down and a time to build up." (Ecclesiastes 3:3)
So... 6 weeks after my mastectomy, it was time to start chemotherapy. Lots of people have asked me why chemo? Well, the oncologist told us that my tumor was a grade 3 out of 3 aggressiveness so - pretty much as aggressive as it could be. Add that to the fact that I was 35 years old (which is still considered "young" in the world of Breast Cancer), I had 2 strikes against me. Then, there was the fact that the pathology that said I had a "triple negative tumor" (estrogen & progesterone receptor negative - ER/PR and Her2/neu negative) meaning that neither Tamoxifan nor Herceptin would be viable options for my long term treatment. Fortunately, I had opted for a mastectomy immediately so they got clear margins (enough tissue without cancer cells) so I did not need to undergo radiation. The final strike against me was the fact that my aunt on mom's side had breast cancer (same pathology) and my maternal Grandmother had died of ovarian cancer. It was enough for the geneticist to deem that I had "hereditary breast & ovarian cancer syndrome". And so a path of treatment was set...
I was sceduled for a 6 round protocol of what is called "FEC" (fluorouracil, epirubicin, cyclophosphamide). A "round" is a 21 day cycle where day 1 is the day you get the drugs via IV and day 21 is the day before you go again. This also entails a blood test to check your neutrophils (a component of your white blood cells) if the neutrophils are at acceptable levels, you get your next round, if not, you wait another week. I won't go into great detail about my time going through chemo at this point but suffice to say, my body did not rebound quickly and all of my treatments were 4 weeks apart. They did try a drug called "neulasta" to help super-charge my bone marrow but my nurse practitioner said I was only the 2nd person they'd ever seen at the Cross Cancer institute whose body did not respond to the $2700/injection treatment. Go figure!
Anyway, let me back up for a minute... the FEC protocol guarantees the loss of hair - all of it! So, on August 11/07 just 2 days before I was to start chemotherapy, I decided to have a "pre-chemo head-shaving party". I invited my family and many friends. Our house was jam packed that night. Much to Janelle's chagrin, I enlisted her to pre-emptively shave my head. I just couldn't bear the thought of waiting for it to fall out. We had fun with it and I felt good about my decision.
Chemo started on August 13 and my last IV was on December 17/07. Each visit was about 3 hours and, fortunately, I did not have to do it alone. I was very blessed to have friends or family with me for most of my visits to the Cross; whether for blood tests or chemo. Sherwin came the first & second time but I let him off the hook the remaining 4 :-) Elisa really wanted to see it so she came the 2nd round but was bored silly by 1/2 way through. My friend, Kristen, came from Victoria for a week to be with me for round 3 and helped my family for a week. Lisa came from Ontario for round 4. This was an incredible blessing to my family and me; we felt so thankful to their families for letting them come help us. Sheri, a friend since college, sat through round 5 with me and kept me laughing for 3 hours. Miriam, a new friend, helped the time for round 6 disappear in no time! Through the entire experience of chemo, numerous friends & family members did more than I could ever recount to help us. Our Church family surrounded us with love, Long View supported us, new friends were made and old friends were helpful; we couldn't have made it without them. Laurel was there for the 1st round of chemo and she showed up with a supportive card before every round. Janelle, Sandra, & Susan were always there to help with the girls or just have coffee & conversation. I met so many new people who opened their hearts to me and helped me through; I met Jessica who was going through the same thing as me and we were able to support each other. The teachers at school who were so supportive of our girls - the list goes on and on...
Medically, there were numerous "issues" such as a bout with pneumonia resulting in a 3 day hospital stay, trouble with IVs resulting in a PIC line, lack of response to meds, etc. BUT, mostly, those felt minor to me. The loss of my hair was even minor to me (the worst part was losing my nose hair - you have no idea how useful nose hair is until you don't have it!!!!) I thought it would be a big deal but, I had fun with it. I especially enjoyed how quickly I could change my look and how quickly I could get ready to go out!
Emotionally, there were a few bumps in the road; most notably, after my bout with pneumonia. When I came home from the hospital, we found out from Elisa's teacher that she'd been crying at school because she believed it was her fault I'd gotten sick (she'd had a cold). It broke my heart that she took this on herself. It was also shortly after my bout with pneumonia that I broke down. I felt so completely broken; physically, emotionally & mentally. Fortunately, I just didn't let myself stay in that spot for long mostly due to the support I had from Sherwin and other friends.
That pretty much sums up the journey from a mainly physical experience. My next post will be more about the spiritual journey I underwent as a result of my diagnosis; it's the real reason I'm even writing this and the reason that I truly see my cancer as a blessing in my life.
Until next time... God Bless.
So... 6 weeks after my mastectomy, it was time to start chemotherapy. Lots of people have asked me why chemo? Well, the oncologist told us that my tumor was a grade 3 out of 3 aggressiveness so - pretty much as aggressive as it could be. Add that to the fact that I was 35 years old (which is still considered "young" in the world of Breast Cancer), I had 2 strikes against me. Then, there was the fact that the pathology that said I had a "triple negative tumor" (estrogen & progesterone receptor negative - ER/PR and Her2/neu negative) meaning that neither Tamoxifan nor Herceptin would be viable options for my long term treatment. Fortunately, I had opted for a mastectomy immediately so they got clear margins (enough tissue without cancer cells) so I did not need to undergo radiation. The final strike against me was the fact that my aunt on mom's side had breast cancer (same pathology) and my maternal Grandmother had died of ovarian cancer. It was enough for the geneticist to deem that I had "hereditary breast & ovarian cancer syndrome". And so a path of treatment was set...
I was sceduled for a 6 round protocol of what is called "FEC" (fluorouracil, epirubicin, cyclophosphamide). A "round" is a 21 day cycle where day 1 is the day you get the drugs via IV and day 21 is the day before you go again. This also entails a blood test to check your neutrophils (a component of your white blood cells) if the neutrophils are at acceptable levels, you get your next round, if not, you wait another week. I won't go into great detail about my time going through chemo at this point but suffice to say, my body did not rebound quickly and all of my treatments were 4 weeks apart. They did try a drug called "neulasta" to help super-charge my bone marrow but my nurse practitioner said I was only the 2nd person they'd ever seen at the Cross Cancer institute whose body did not respond to the $2700/injection treatment. Go figure!
Anyway, let me back up for a minute... the FEC protocol guarantees the loss of hair - all of it! So, on August 11/07 just 2 days before I was to start chemotherapy, I decided to have a "pre-chemo head-shaving party". I invited my family and many friends. Our house was jam packed that night. Much to Janelle's chagrin, I enlisted her to pre-emptively shave my head. I just couldn't bear the thought of waiting for it to fall out. We had fun with it and I felt good about my decision.
Chemo started on August 13 and my last IV was on December 17/07. Each visit was about 3 hours and, fortunately, I did not have to do it alone. I was very blessed to have friends or family with me for most of my visits to the Cross; whether for blood tests or chemo. Sherwin came the first & second time but I let him off the hook the remaining 4 :-) Elisa really wanted to see it so she came the 2nd round but was bored silly by 1/2 way through. My friend, Kristen, came from Victoria for a week to be with me for round 3 and helped my family for a week. Lisa came from Ontario for round 4. This was an incredible blessing to my family and me; we felt so thankful to their families for letting them come help us. Sheri, a friend since college, sat through round 5 with me and kept me laughing for 3 hours. Miriam, a new friend, helped the time for round 6 disappear in no time! Through the entire experience of chemo, numerous friends & family members did more than I could ever recount to help us. Our Church family surrounded us with love, Long View supported us, new friends were made and old friends were helpful; we couldn't have made it without them. Laurel was there for the 1st round of chemo and she showed up with a supportive card before every round. Janelle, Sandra, & Susan were always there to help with the girls or just have coffee & conversation. I met so many new people who opened their hearts to me and helped me through; I met Jessica who was going through the same thing as me and we were able to support each other. The teachers at school who were so supportive of our girls - the list goes on and on...
Medically, there were numerous "issues" such as a bout with pneumonia resulting in a 3 day hospital stay, trouble with IVs resulting in a PIC line, lack of response to meds, etc. BUT, mostly, those felt minor to me. The loss of my hair was even minor to me (the worst part was losing my nose hair - you have no idea how useful nose hair is until you don't have it!!!!) I thought it would be a big deal but, I had fun with it. I especially enjoyed how quickly I could change my look and how quickly I could get ready to go out!
Emotionally, there were a few bumps in the road; most notably, after my bout with pneumonia. When I came home from the hospital, we found out from Elisa's teacher that she'd been crying at school because she believed it was her fault I'd gotten sick (she'd had a cold). It broke my heart that she took this on herself. It was also shortly after my bout with pneumonia that I broke down. I felt so completely broken; physically, emotionally & mentally. Fortunately, I just didn't let myself stay in that spot for long mostly due to the support I had from Sherwin and other friends.
That pretty much sums up the journey from a mainly physical experience. My next post will be more about the spiritual journey I underwent as a result of my diagnosis; it's the real reason I'm even writing this and the reason that I truly see my cancer as a blessing in my life.
Until next time... God Bless.
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
"A time to cry..."
"A time for cry and a time to laugh. A time to grieve and a time to dance."
(Ecclesiastes 3:4)
(I'll apologize up front for the length of this post)
As I talked about in my previous post, 11 months after our move to the Edmonton area, our world was shaken.
On the Sunday night of the May 2007 long weekend, I was snuggling with Blyss (then 3 years old). She was being silly and decided to "steamroller" over me. I put my hand across my chest as protection and noticed something that felt like a lump. But, it couldn't be, could it??? It had to have been my imagination. My first instinct was panic & tears but I didn't want to scare my daughter. However, when Sherwin walked in, it was another story; I couldn't control the fear that was threatening to envelop me. Sherwin is a very calm, not overly emotional but very gentle person. He just held me and reassured me that everything was fine; don't panic, God would be with us... blah, blah, blah... at least that's what I heard, I new in my head he was 100% right but I just needed my moment of panic. I didn't have a doctor yet (I'd been too busy since moving to think of it) but I called a friend who pulled some strings at her husband's clinic and got me in for the Tuesday.
The doctor reassured me (based on statistics) that it was unlikely to be cancerous then proceeded to examine me. However, as he checked the lump, he said "something doesn't seem quite right, it could be nothing but let's get it checked out."
Friday, May 25/07, I had a mammogram & ultrasound. Heidi and one of my closest friends, Laurel, came to my appointment with me. Any woman who has been through a mammogram knows that to say it's "uncomfortable" is a gentle but add the fact that you're 35 and having it because you have a lump in your breast, and the discomfort is the least of your concerns. The radiologist recommended a biopsy. It was scheduled for a biopsy on June 11/07 - just over 2 weeks from my mammogram. The wait was tough!
Monday, June 18, 2007 at 1:30pm my doctor looked at me and said "there is no easy way to say this but, you have breast cancer. I'm so sorry." I was in shock. I literally felt like I was watching a TV show. I cried for a bit but quickly pulled myself together. By the time I got back to the office, I got a call from the doctor's office - my appointment with the surgeon was the next day. WHAT?!?!? Could this really be happening?
I started making phone calls. So many tears... it was so hard to for everyone who loved me. I spent much of the time comforting others. Then, to tell our girls. Elisa (10) just looked at me and barely responded; Aphia (8) cried and held on to me; Blyss (3) really didn't get it.
Tuesday, June 19, with my parents by my side, the surgeon explained my options: lumpectomy or left-side mastectomy. He believed the tumour was growing rapidly and wanted to schedule surgery for Friday - yes, that's right, Friday of the same week. I decided on a mastectomy.
Wednesday, June 20, the day I had to tell my team that I would be off indefinitely and why. Shock overwhelmed the group. I was pretty much walking away from all my responsibilities at work - I felt so guilty. I remember thinking "at least with maternity leave, I had time to prepare and hand things off in a well planned out fashion."
Thursday, June 21, the plethora of appointments & tests started at 8am; my friend, Sheri, came from Calgary to be with me.
Elisa, who hadn't talked much since we told her about the cancer asked if she could talk to me. She said "so, what exactly is the procedure for tomorrow?" I explained the surgery as simply as possible. Her next question broke my heart; with big tears in her eyes, she asked me "does this run in families?" I told her that hopefully, by the time she has to think of about it, there would be a cure.
As I was putting Blyss to bed, I told her that I wouldn't be able to carry her for a few weeks. She asked me why so I told her that the doctor was going to cut off my breast to take away the yucky cancer. She asked me when I would get a new "booby". At the time, I didn't understand how long everything would take so I said "hopefully, by Christmas time". She looked at me dead serious and said, "well, Santa can bring you a booby but he's bringing me a kitty." I couldn't help but laugh - it felt great to laugh and I realized, I hadn't laughed much that week.
Friday, June 22, surgery day... up until that point, I'd never even had stitches! By the time I came out of surgery, my parents, Heidi, Sherwin, & Susan were all there. I felt pretty good coming out of surgery and we managed to call about 20 people between my sister & I in less than 10 minutes - that's when the nurse caught us using our cell phones and put an end to it :-) I had a number of visitors to the hospital on Friday afternoon & evening. It was great! And, I was feeling pretty good.
Saturday, June 23, I was home with orders to take it easy for 6 weeks - no lifting, no vacuuming (shucks!), no overdoing it at all.
The next few days brought many visitors (from as far away as Ontario) as well as many plants, flowers, gift baskets & meals. My employer provided us with a number of frozen meals and our Church mobilized numerous people to provide us with hot, cooked meals for the first week. I felt overwhelmingly loved and blessed.
My life was changing... so fast, so crazy fast. You know what I realized, though, not once did I think "why me". I credit that, at least in part, to seeing my Aunt handle her breast cancer with grace, steadfast faith & humour. I knew I was in for the ride of my life; what did God have in store for me?
(Ecclesiastes 3:4)
(I'll apologize up front for the length of this post)
As I talked about in my previous post, 11 months after our move to the Edmonton area, our world was shaken.
On the Sunday night of the May 2007 long weekend, I was snuggling with Blyss (then 3 years old). She was being silly and decided to "steamroller" over me. I put my hand across my chest as protection and noticed something that felt like a lump. But, it couldn't be, could it??? It had to have been my imagination. My first instinct was panic & tears but I didn't want to scare my daughter. However, when Sherwin walked in, it was another story; I couldn't control the fear that was threatening to envelop me. Sherwin is a very calm, not overly emotional but very gentle person. He just held me and reassured me that everything was fine; don't panic, God would be with us... blah, blah, blah... at least that's what I heard, I new in my head he was 100% right but I just needed my moment of panic. I didn't have a doctor yet (I'd been too busy since moving to think of it) but I called a friend who pulled some strings at her husband's clinic and got me in for the Tuesday.
The doctor reassured me (based on statistics) that it was unlikely to be cancerous then proceeded to examine me. However, as he checked the lump, he said "something doesn't seem quite right, it could be nothing but let's get it checked out."
Friday, May 25/07, I had a mammogram & ultrasound. Heidi and one of my closest friends, Laurel, came to my appointment with me. Any woman who has been through a mammogram knows that to say it's "uncomfortable" is a gentle but add the fact that you're 35 and having it because you have a lump in your breast, and the discomfort is the least of your concerns. The radiologist recommended a biopsy. It was scheduled for a biopsy on June 11/07 - just over 2 weeks from my mammogram. The wait was tough!
Monday, June 18, 2007 at 1:30pm my doctor looked at me and said "there is no easy way to say this but, you have breast cancer. I'm so sorry." I was in shock. I literally felt like I was watching a TV show. I cried for a bit but quickly pulled myself together. By the time I got back to the office, I got a call from the doctor's office - my appointment with the surgeon was the next day. WHAT?!?!? Could this really be happening?
I started making phone calls. So many tears... it was so hard to for everyone who loved me. I spent much of the time comforting others. Then, to tell our girls. Elisa (10) just looked at me and barely responded; Aphia (8) cried and held on to me; Blyss (3) really didn't get it.
Tuesday, June 19, with my parents by my side, the surgeon explained my options: lumpectomy or left-side mastectomy. He believed the tumour was growing rapidly and wanted to schedule surgery for Friday - yes, that's right, Friday of the same week. I decided on a mastectomy.
Wednesday, June 20, the day I had to tell my team that I would be off indefinitely and why. Shock overwhelmed the group. I was pretty much walking away from all my responsibilities at work - I felt so guilty. I remember thinking "at least with maternity leave, I had time to prepare and hand things off in a well planned out fashion."
Thursday, June 21, the plethora of appointments & tests started at 8am; my friend, Sheri, came from Calgary to be with me.
Elisa, who hadn't talked much since we told her about the cancer asked if she could talk to me. She said "so, what exactly is the procedure for tomorrow?" I explained the surgery as simply as possible. Her next question broke my heart; with big tears in her eyes, she asked me "does this run in families?" I told her that hopefully, by the time she has to think of about it, there would be a cure.
As I was putting Blyss to bed, I told her that I wouldn't be able to carry her for a few weeks. She asked me why so I told her that the doctor was going to cut off my breast to take away the yucky cancer. She asked me when I would get a new "booby". At the time, I didn't understand how long everything would take so I said "hopefully, by Christmas time". She looked at me dead serious and said, "well, Santa can bring you a booby but he's bringing me a kitty." I couldn't help but laugh - it felt great to laugh and I realized, I hadn't laughed much that week.
Friday, June 22, surgery day... up until that point, I'd never even had stitches! By the time I came out of surgery, my parents, Heidi, Sherwin, & Susan were all there. I felt pretty good coming out of surgery and we managed to call about 20 people between my sister & I in less than 10 minutes - that's when the nurse caught us using our cell phones and put an end to it :-) I had a number of visitors to the hospital on Friday afternoon & evening. It was great! And, I was feeling pretty good.
Saturday, June 23, I was home with orders to take it easy for 6 weeks - no lifting, no vacuuming (shucks!), no overdoing it at all.
The next few days brought many visitors (from as far away as Ontario) as well as many plants, flowers, gift baskets & meals. My employer provided us with a number of frozen meals and our Church mobilized numerous people to provide us with hot, cooked meals for the first week. I felt overwhelmingly loved and blessed.
My life was changing... so fast, so crazy fast. You know what I realized, though, not once did I think "why me". I credit that, at least in part, to seeing my Aunt handle her breast cancer with grace, steadfast faith & humour. I knew I was in for the ride of my life; what did God have in store for me?
Monday, March 2, 2009
"There's a time for everything..."
"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the sun" (Ecclesiastes 3:1)
Well, after much prodding, I've decided the time is now to start a blog regardless of how incompetent I feel at this moment. But, I guess that's what learning is all about, moving from incompetence to competence, ignorance to enlightenment.
This is a season in my life where I feel like I'm finally, not only seeking, but also, discovering God's will for my life. This time in my life has come about through a progression over the past few years; culminating in many changes for my family & me.
I'll start by telling you a little about myself. I am from a wonderful family: sister, brothers, & loving parents who have been married for almost 39 years (an incredible love story but I'll save that for another post). I have a terrific husband (Sherwin) whom I met in college over 18 years ago - we've been married for 14 1/2 years and have 3 beautiful daughters age 12, 10 & 5. I did well in school but always planned to grow up, get married & stay home with my kids; college & university were just "something you did" when it was easy.
That wasn't how things worked out for me.
After finishing my degree in English with a PR focus, I "fell" into a career in Information Technology (IT) where I rapidly moved into the leadership ranks. Honestly, I never really cared about IT. I cared about people, customer service and did have an ability to understand the IT world. It didn't take long for my passion for people to really take over and helped me gain a reputation for building strong teams. It was instinct and intuition and a little luck at first. However, I took a 1 day team building course through work after a merger we were involved in. It was amazing! It gave me so much. The course helped me understand my strengths and the strengths of others but more than that, it articulated so much of what I "felt" regarding team & leadership. It impacted me so much that I spent my own money to take a 4 day course. I believe this course helped me immensely over the next 6 years as I worked for arguably the best IT company around (Long View Systems).
My career at Long View was rewarding and filled with growth, great people and opportunity. It was also a phenomenally fast-paced and fast-growth company which meant LOTS of work and stress. As part of the management team, I was privileged to work with the most incredibly group of talented and caring people - who were also all over-achievers. We set the bar high and loved to raise the bar. My personality is such that I am so afraid of letting people down so I kept giving all I had. I lived and breathed work but didn't even realize it. My husband & girls were the ones who got the short-end of the stick. They were remarkably patient (which is what I came to expect) but, I didn't even stop long enough most times to realize all I'd missed. Bear in mind, my job never "made" me work like this, it was just what happened. It was a slow-fade.
Anyway, time marched on and I was offered a transfer from Calgary to Edmonton to help get the new branch off the ground. Since Edmonton was so much closer to my family, we opted to take it. Knowing this would mean a lot of work for the first few months for me, Sherwin took a 1/2 time role so that he could be home with the kids to help with the transition. The move was great for us in so many ways: the team in Edmonton was AWESOME, the community we moved to couldn't have been better, my family was close by and Sherwin got to coach again. I, of course, fell into my workaholic, afraid to disappoint, somewhat competitive ways and worked A LOT. So much that I put my marriage at serious risk and felt at a loss as to how to fix it.
And then, about 11 months after we relocated, our world was shaken to the core....
But, that story is for next time. I'm so tired I can barely keep my eyes open.
Until next time, God Bless.
Well, after much prodding, I've decided the time is now to start a blog regardless of how incompetent I feel at this moment. But, I guess that's what learning is all about, moving from incompetence to competence, ignorance to enlightenment.
This is a season in my life where I feel like I'm finally, not only seeking, but also, discovering God's will for my life. This time in my life has come about through a progression over the past few years; culminating in many changes for my family & me.
I'll start by telling you a little about myself. I am from a wonderful family: sister, brothers, & loving parents who have been married for almost 39 years (an incredible love story but I'll save that for another post). I have a terrific husband (Sherwin) whom I met in college over 18 years ago - we've been married for 14 1/2 years and have 3 beautiful daughters age 12, 10 & 5. I did well in school but always planned to grow up, get married & stay home with my kids; college & university were just "something you did" when it was easy.
That wasn't how things worked out for me.
After finishing my degree in English with a PR focus, I "fell" into a career in Information Technology (IT) where I rapidly moved into the leadership ranks. Honestly, I never really cared about IT. I cared about people, customer service and did have an ability to understand the IT world. It didn't take long for my passion for people to really take over and helped me gain a reputation for building strong teams. It was instinct and intuition and a little luck at first. However, I took a 1 day team building course through work after a merger we were involved in. It was amazing! It gave me so much. The course helped me understand my strengths and the strengths of others but more than that, it articulated so much of what I "felt" regarding team & leadership. It impacted me so much that I spent my own money to take a 4 day course. I believe this course helped me immensely over the next 6 years as I worked for arguably the best IT company around (Long View Systems).
My career at Long View was rewarding and filled with growth, great people and opportunity. It was also a phenomenally fast-paced and fast-growth company which meant LOTS of work and stress. As part of the management team, I was privileged to work with the most incredibly group of talented and caring people - who were also all over-achievers. We set the bar high and loved to raise the bar. My personality is such that I am so afraid of letting people down so I kept giving all I had. I lived and breathed work but didn't even realize it. My husband & girls were the ones who got the short-end of the stick. They were remarkably patient (which is what I came to expect) but, I didn't even stop long enough most times to realize all I'd missed. Bear in mind, my job never "made" me work like this, it was just what happened. It was a slow-fade.
Anyway, time marched on and I was offered a transfer from Calgary to Edmonton to help get the new branch off the ground. Since Edmonton was so much closer to my family, we opted to take it. Knowing this would mean a lot of work for the first few months for me, Sherwin took a 1/2 time role so that he could be home with the kids to help with the transition. The move was great for us in so many ways: the team in Edmonton was AWESOME, the community we moved to couldn't have been better, my family was close by and Sherwin got to coach again. I, of course, fell into my workaholic, afraid to disappoint, somewhat competitive ways and worked A LOT. So much that I put my marriage at serious risk and felt at a loss as to how to fix it.
And then, about 11 months after we relocated, our world was shaken to the core....
But, that story is for next time. I'm so tired I can barely keep my eyes open.
Until next time, God Bless.
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California trip
A group of my "rocks"